Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Just another Cinderella story

Long long time ago, just when Cinderella was taking a nap in the kitchen, she thought she heard her stepsisters' foot steps. Immediately she picked up the broom and pretended to sweep.

STEPSISTER #1: Hey Cinderella, we're going to the palace ball tonight, so good for you, you don't have to cook dinner!
CINDERELLA: What? Since when is the palace opened to the public?
STEPSISTER #2 (shoved a pamphet onto Cinderella face and chuckled): Yo, baby sister, haven't you heard? The king feels that the palace is too big and there is not enough people in it, so he has decided to open up the gates for everyone and anyone!
CINDERELLA: Whether rich or poor?
STEPSISTER #2: Whether with a degree or illiterate, whether you come from an honorable family or a criminal one!
CINDERELLA (eyes beaming): Cool!
STEPSISTER #1: Hey Cinderella, you're not thinking of going right?
CINDERELLA (gasped): Why not? You girls are going right?
STEPSISTER #1: Yah, we're going of course. But you can't go! Look at the kind of rubbish you're wearing! The people in the palace only respect people that dress well, regardless of how they themselves wear shorts and slippers at time!
STEPSISTER #2: Unless you're an Ang Mor. Then you can wear just about anything and the royal family will still welcome you with arms wide opened.
STEPSISTER #1: But too bad you're not! Ha!

With that insult, the stepsisters walked out of the kitchen laughing. Cinderella looked down at the old and dirty dress that she was wearing and sighed. Just at that moment, a strong light embraced the whole kitchen and with a "thud", one old lady appeared in front of her.

CINDERELLA (shocked): Oui aunty, where are you from? This is private property!
FAIRY GODMOTHER (grinning): Relac lah! I'm here to help you. I heard you want to go to the palace ball?
CINDERELLA (eyes wide opened): Of course! You can help me? Really?
FAIRY GODMOTHER (chuckled): Of course dear! I can get you into the palace on any pass you want! Social pass, student pass, work permit, you name it and you'll get it! At the right price of course!
CINDERELLA (lifts left eye brow): At the right price?
FAIRY GODMOTHER: Hey girl, I've got to earn a living too yah? It's just a little commission, but for the way into a better life!
CINDERELLA: Oh well... okay, whatever... but I don't have a degree and I don't even have any skill!
FAIRY GODMOTHER (chuckled): Don't worry dear, the guards don't check for these stuff these days, all are free to enter! I just needa give you a nice piece of dress and we can get going!

And so the fairy godmother dressed Cinderella up and shoved her to the palace. Indeed, the guards did not ask even one question and let her in. The palace was not as huge as Cinderella had imagined and the whole ballroom was crowded with people, some were from the palace itself, but even more were outsiders like her.

Cinderella walked around and saw Stepsister #1 leaning against a pillar. She was tagging any man that walked by and shouting "Cheap! Cheap! We don't have to go Geylang! Joo Chiat, Lavender, Kovan also can!"

Cinderella then caught Stepsister #2 at another corner. She was providing massage service to some rich dukes and Cinderella thought she heard her stepsister whispered "I also offer special service" to one of them.

Cinderella was so engrossed looking around the palace that she tripped on one of the outsider's dress and fell. When she tried to get back on her feet, she realised that she had twisted her ankle. It was then it happened. While Cinderella was sitting there with her twisted ankle, a duke walked past and threw a coin onto the ground in front of her. Then another lady did the same. Cinderella was stunned but thrilled.

CINDERELLA (to herself): So it is true that you can earn easy money in the palace!

And so Cinderella continued to sit on the ground to collect money thrown to her. To attract more people, she even tried to sing some oldies. Then he appeared.

PRINCE CHARMING (bending down to hold Cinderella's hand): Babe, you're beautiful! A pity that you're handicapped.
CINDERELLA: No, no! Actually I'm not!
PRINCE CHARMING (eyes blinking): Huh? You're not?
CINDERELLA (struggling to stand up): No, no! See! I can stand!
PRINCE CHARMING: Ohh... oh well, then it's good! Do you want to dance?
CINDERELLA (nodding eagerly): Yes, yes! Of course!
PRINCE CHARMING: Can you bear me some children?
CINDERELLA (still nodding eagerly): Yes, yes! Of course!
PRINCE CHARMING: Can you bear me a dozen of kids and stay at home to look after them?
CINDERELLA (still nodding eagerly): Yes, yes! Of course!
PRINCE CHARMING: Great! Let's get married then!

And so Prince Charming married Cinderella and both of them lived happily ever after, okay, at least while he had the money

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